midnitemoon.com » Poems

Over And Over Again

Allison — Fri, 10 Dec 2004 14:47:43 +0000

What sound can be heard over the deafening din
    of a breaking heart so true
That shatters like glass into sharp-edged shards
    at the thought of losing you
Love that was offered with purest intent
    in innocence was also in vain
Scars will be left from this grievous wound
    and the tears will leave a dark stain
My chest is crushed by the weight of despair
    so that it’s difficult to breathe
Smiles will no longer easily come
    now that you’ve decided to leave

If You Want To Kiss The Sky

Allison — Mon, 01 Nov 2004 22:23:55 +0000

I have 100 entries posted on this site. 100 sets of paragraphs talking about different aspects of my life, things that make me laugh or puzzle me, links to other places I’ve been and thoughts about the world around me. Every now and then I crack the surface a little and share something a bit more personal. Usually it’s nothing surprising. I stay away from close examinations of my emotions unless it’s in vague terms or over expected subjects. It’s one thing to post a sad poem without telling the source of the pain or to talk about wistful longing for the fleeting youth of my daughters but it’s different to say something that’s really real.

I’m fairly guarded about my inner self. I don’t open the door for just anyone. I keep a tight lid on my vulnerabilities and have built a fortress to protect my heart. Mostly that’s worked out fine for me. Friends don’t mind taking the time to work their way through the chinks in my armor. There’s no rush. The only time it’s a problem is in relationships. Everyone wants inside without having to go through the obstacle course. Whether that’s fair or not I leave for others to decide. It is what it is.

Standing in my stone tower I’m presented with an option. I built this castle to lock out those who would hurt me but my stronghold has turned on me and is now holding me hostage from someone who might want to love me. The trick is that I’m still holding the key and can open the door at any time. The question is whether I’m brave enough to turn it and let myself out.

He doesn’t trust me and it seems that it’s because I’ve given him reason not to. His friends and his family don’t want us to be together. The honest truth is that my family might not be too keen on this either if I ever had the guts to tell them. He’s much braver than I because he at least had the courage to face their disapproval. He’s made sacrifices because he cares for me and I haven’t appreciated the risks he’s taken. But I’m starting to see. I’m starting to understand.

Boy, you have the most beautiful heart I’ve ever seen. I see you growing and changing and I am amazed by who you are. Your strength and passion are like a fire that keeps me warm and sheds light on the darkest places in me. You make me want to dust out the hidden corners in my mind and heart so that I can be clean and new just for you. My everything isn’t much but I will give it all to you. If I act like a fool then at least I do it for love.

If I were a man I would send you flowers
If I were rich I would buy you a car
If I were an artist I would paint you a sunset
If I were an astronomer I would find you a star

But all I am is a poet
And an off-key one at that
A verse is all I have to give
And even this is falling flat

Save us all from this rhyming
It was awful right from the start
Tell me that you’ll have me
And I’ll give you the key to my heart

How I Wonder What You Are

Allison — Mon, 23 Aug 2004 19:02:11 +0000

Twinkle twinkle little star
Seems to me the world’s on fire
Burning across the midnite sky
No wonder no one wants to try
Live for you what’s mine is your’s
My heart is caught in slamming doors
You’re bigger than I’ll ever be
So you have the right to stand and judge me
McDonald’s Burger King and Taco Bell
The first three gates that lead to Hell
Run run as fast as you can
Can’t catch me I’m Instant Messenger Man
People too busy in a hurried rush
Taught the toilets so we wouldn’t have to flush
Give me give me is all we say
Take me take me take me away
Anywhere must be better than here
With constant racket resounding in my ear
There’s no one left that knows how to fly
Like a diamond in the sky

Share The Wine At My Table

Allison — Fri, 13 Aug 2004 23:35:31 +0000

The following is not an endorsement of any product nor is it a sanction of any such action which would lead to the creation of such gibberish as would be created in an inebriated state following the imbibing of aforementioned unendorsed product. Wifey knows what I’m talking about.
He will hear gossip whisper sense like
Mother put father though he traveled very wet
And did make you spoon
Like they are disco
But commit spin, it’s the summer
Put cantaloupe to promote hammer
In Mike’s gift of pretzel underwear
All though our embrace was too good
So they was like
Ditch be stubble
Haggle is my bag
I am meeting not always sense
He too seeks enthusiasm
And did eat leaner stubbley catapults
This poem made possible in part by the esteemed bottlers of Mike’s Hard Cranberry Lemonade made by Mike’s Hard Lemonade Co., Rochester NY.

Really Bad Poetry

Allison — Sun, 25 Jan 2004 23:00:55 +0000

Inspired by the beautiful verses I heard the other night at Def Poetry Jam I decided to pull out my old notebook of poems. I was not necessarily surprised by the raw lack of talent demonstrated in most of them. To say that they are a heaping mound of rubbish might be an overstatement, but it’s one that I’m willing to make.

See, most of the crap was written years ago when I was under the assumption that if I just kept writing that I would be good at it. Practice makes perfect and all that mumbo jumbo. I was wrong. Writing words on a page without taking the time to study them does not make a better writer. It makes a great heaping mound of rubbish.

I do have to admit that every few pages I found a line here or there that actually flowed well. That was encouraging. And then I stumbled on one that actually had a title. This is notable because I only put titles on things when I’m done with them AND have decided the thing doesn’t suck. Once I saw the title I had to read the whole poem and once I finished reading I had to laugh and once I was done laughing I had to share.
Vacation
Head cracked on rock
Walking in the sand
Blood across my forehead
Can’t remember who I am
Got two eyes, two ears, two arms, two legs
A nose and a mouth
I see, I hear and I feel it all
On the inside and the out
My name might have been quite beautiful
My life could have been so grand
Then I cracked my head upon a rock
Now I’m walking in the sand
I have a vague recollection of writing this one and I know that it amused me at the time. Hopefully this is as funny to others as it is to me, or maybe this is going to be one of those things where you had to be there. If it is then it is and I won’t try to explain it.

The Night

Allison — Sat, 10 Jan 2004 21:09:07 +0000

Sometimes she screams when no one is there
No one to hear her when she is scared
The world is too close when the night closes in
The moon hangs down low
Flickering in the wind
Crickets creep through the grass in the yard
The sound dances up to greet the stars
Alone in her room, alone with her thoughts
Sparring with demons
She’s already fought
Day in and day out
Going up coming down
Losing a battle
She has already won
She screams in the night when she’s wide awake
Cries herself to sleep when that’s what it takes
Because the world is too close when the night closes in
The moon hangs down low
Flickering in the wind

So Sad

Allison — Tue, 05 Nov 2002 11:41:50 +0000

The tears keep coming
Unbidden, unwanted
And the big stick keeps pounding
Slamming into my head
At some point it will stop
It must when I’m dead
When there is nothing left of me at all
Is there anything there now
Anyone peeking through the sockets of my eyes
Where once I imagined a spark
Extinguished now by my tears
Because all I am now is
So sad